Running on empty...

I noticed tonight that I haven't blogged very much in the past few weeks. Maybe it is because I am running on empty.

Once at an artist conference John and I attended, the speaker said something I've found to be very true. He said that artists need certain things to keep the creative spark inside alive. If too many things drain the tank, the creative spark dies and it can take a lot to get it back.

After a discouraging conference, a week of being sick, and multiple draining encounters at work, I find I'm completely empty. Two migraines two days in a row and a blood pressure reading off the charts sealed the deal. I went to the doctor today. He didn't write me a prescription. He gave me advice.

The advice mirrored the man at the artists conference. You can't keep giving out without putting back in. Somehow in the course of your days, encouragement has to outweigh the discouragement.

The thing is--though you can control the amount of positive energy you put into other people's buckets--you can't always control who takes from yours. But you can control who you give access to.

My goal over the next three days is to spend time with the most energy-generating people I know doing things that feed my soul. As a deposit on that, John brought me an armful of pink roses and Toby--my little sheltie--snuggled me as I laid in a dark room waiting for the migraine to fade.

One thing is certain. I can't continue to operate in deficit mode. My body won't let me.